Was I to know that would befall was emptiness of any emotion?
perhaps it would have been better to never have loved
but it matters not, as emotions are absent from me now completely
as absent as he has become to my life and my heart
I feel neither sorrow nor joy, I feel not the absence of love
I merely acknowledge it as a fact, and a curiosity to me now
Spring has arrived and cool winds blow as the rain begins to fall
seasons may change but my heart remains the same, unfeeling as it has been, it remains
this expected change awakens my thoughts but nothing else
my heart is latent my emotions are docile
I have neither cried nor rejoiced in ages
And now as spring arrives and brings with it neither sadness nor fury
It awakens me to the apathy that is within my very heart
to pretended passions where nothing remains
to depths once searched, and longed for and loved
it is a curious emotional state, an abstract soul
And so spring arrives comes to neither thunderous applause nor a weaning spirit
but merely comes and is acknowledged, already fully weaned of emotion
days flow into each other seamlessly
each different in theory but not noticeable enough to invoke a heart to feel
as to enliven the spirit
Perhaps an effort could or should be made
to encounter that which once loved, entertained, feared, and sang
Effort would necessitate desire and motive for a result
and there is none to be had here
Quietly spring arrives to nothingness in my heart.
I disagree Lord Tennyson, 'tis better to never have loved at all
Then perhaps hope and desire would remain.
For once the heart is killed so deeply, it cannot again revive
Tut tut, it matters not, I do not desire a heart that could break.
Tut, tut it looks like rain.
